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January 29, 2013 By Robyn

When Goal Setting Goes Bad

Last July I committed to simplifying my life.

You know – declutter, organize, procrastinate less, create more.

In fact, I wrote a detailed post outlining my plan.

I’ve made some headway and it’s due time for an update – more like a progress report of sorts (eek). Here it goes.

  • Create a daily MIT list (most important things) – A
  • Mindfulness – B+
  • Purge – B
  • Unplug from the internet – F

Teacher’s Comments: Robyn works hard in class, but doesn’t seem to put much energy behind the subjects she’s not passionate about. Also, she is easily distracted.

Sorry, having a little fun here.

Oh yeah, that big old F.

F-Report-Card

If you’ve read this blog for awhile, you know I’m not a fan of beating myself up. I prefer to look at “failure” as a learning opportunity.

When it comes to setting realistic goals, we have to (a) want to do what it takes to achieve the goal and (b) believe that we are capable of doing what it takes.

Let’s look at my original commitment:

“I will shut down my computer on Friday night and fire it back up on Sunday morning.”

I’m certainly capable of turning my computer off – it’s (a) that’s the problem. I don’t want to disconnect for 36 hours. It doesn’t “feel” good to me.

Seems my goal was a bit too lofty.

We all do it. We think to ourselves – if I set this grandiose goal, then I’ll achieve it. Wrong!

For example…

  • I’ll lose 100 pounds this year
  • I’ll run my first marathon (even though I can’t run down the block)
  • I’ll start a new business and make 100K the first year

Then what? We deprive ourselves of all the foods we love, we overdo it at the gym, we get completely overwhelmed – and we GIVE UP.

It’s so very important to create goals that feel good and that we believe are achievable. If you dread doing what it takes to reach your goal, it’s not a good goal and you’re setting yourself up for failure Chickadee.

Reaching our ultimate goal is better achieved using baby steps.

Let’s take a look at my goal from last summer one more time:

“I will shut down my computer on Friday night and fire it back up on Sunday morning.”

The thought of shutting down for a day and half still gives me a panic attack.

Panic-Attack-Woman-203x300

Here’s a new commitment – one that feels good and that I actually want to do.

I will “unplug” each evening at 8:00.

No more surfing until 10:00. No more checking emails right before bed.

Unplugging at 8:00 may not seem like a big deal, but achieving this small goal will create evidence for success (I did it). And that feeling of accomplishment (I did it) often inspires us to set the bar a little higher. Set goals that allow for success.

Maybe one day I’ll actually want to shut down from Friday night until Sunday morning.

Today is not that day. Or tomorrow. Maybe next year.

Stay tuned.

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Filed Under: Simplify

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