In my previous post, I offered up a simple tool to disrupt your inner bully. If you haven’t tried it yet, I highly recommend you do. It’s the easiest way I’ve found to diminish self-shaming. Unwinding years (and often decades) of bullying yourself may seem hard, but not changing a behavior that affects you in negative ways is hard too. Making a deliberate choice to end the war with my body was one of the best gifts I ever gave to myself. When you judge yourself or someone else, you’re not helping yourself or them in any beneficial way. I grew up in a household where we spent a lot of time picking other people apart. The tradition continues to this day… He walked around with his shirt off. I shouldn’t have to look at that!Did … [Read more...] about Let Peace Bloom (Ending the Toxic Practice of Judgment)
Awareness
Disrupt Your Inner Critic
No one likes a bully. Nevertheless, almost every woman has one thing in common. They are a bully to themselves. Most of us aren’t even aware of our behavior. The cruel thoughts just stream through our minds... You’re disgusting.No one would ever find your body attractive.You’d look better wearing a garbage bag.Don’t even think about trying those on. I recently stumbled upon this video. Two best friends wrote down the things they dislike about their own bodies – then proceeded to say these comments out loud, directed at one another. Why do we say things to ourselves that we wouldn't ever say to (or think about) our best friends or children or sisters? When I work with my clients, we focus on one habit for two weeks. I … [Read more...] about Disrupt Your Inner Critic
The “Chapters” of Habit Transformation
This inspiration poem by Portia Nelson somehow escaped me until very recently. Human beings make mistakes. That’s a given. It’s important to understand the process of learning. To analyze our mistakes, to learn from them - and to not repeat them. Sometimes we are just not paying attention - or are living our lives on autopilot. The beauty is – it can be changed. Autobiography in Five Short Chapters by Portia Nelson Chapter 1I walk down the street.There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.I fall in.I am lost. I am helpless.It isn’t my fault. It takes forever to find a way out. Chapter 2I walk down the street.There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.I pretend that I don’t see it.I fall in again.I can’t believe I am in this same … [Read more...] about The “Chapters” of Habit Transformation
4 Reasons We Struggle With Overeating (Hint: It’s Not Your Fault)
Guess what? It’s not your fault. You need to know this. It’s the very first step on the pathway to healing our relationship with food. Most people in industrialized countries struggle with overeating. But why? Reason #1 – Hyperawareness We’ve never been so damn aware of how we look. If you’re living in a primitive village somewhere, there’s no Facebook or Vogue magazine or skinny jeans or bikini competitions or CrossFit or selfies or MIRRORS. We’re hyperaware of physical appearances and we’re constantly comparing. And that’s freaking stressful. Reason #2 – Processed Food There is delicious + cheap food available 24/7. Food that overrides our natural hunger signals and makes our biology go haywire. Food that creates a desire for MORE … [Read more...] about 4 Reasons We Struggle With Overeating (Hint: It’s Not Your Fault)