Robyn Spurr

Personal Health and Weight Loss Coaching For Women

Coaching Tools

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Is “I’m Fat” In Charge of Your Life?

Thoughts swirl around in our minds all day long. And not all of them are rose colored.

I started keeping track of my non-rosy thoughts this morning (knowing that I would be writing this post)…

  • My hair is a mess.
  • I should have worded that email differently.
  • She’s so much fitter than I am.
  • I should get up earlier.

…and it’s only 10:00.

It’s normal to have a wide variety of thoughts. What a relief, right?

The key to creating desirable outcomes has nothing to do with eliminating all of our negative thoughts + feelings. That’s im-fricken-possible! It’s about being able to step back and witness our unproductive thoughts + emotions without letting them run the show.

When you can see the thought + not judge it + not buy into it, then you get to choose how to act – instead of flying on autopilot.

Let’s use, “I’m fat,” as an example.

So many of my clients let these two little words drive their behavior. When your mind starts playing the, “I’m fat,” recording – notice how you act.

Does the thought help you be the person you want to be?

Does it help you do the things you want to do?

My guess is N-O no.

Most of my clients truly want to treat their bodies with care and respect. They want to exercise and make healthy choices. They value self-care.

Now imagine if I could wave my magic wand and just like that, “I’m fat,” no longer had any power over you. Imagine if it didn’t cause you to feel bad or not good enough.

Let that really sink in for a moment. I’m fat = totally unaffected. Did that blow your mind?

How might your life be different if you didn’t have to carry the burden of your thoughts with you?

When we get all tangled up in our story…

  • I’m fat.
  • I have no willpower.
  • I’ll never be healthy.
  • I don’t have the discipline it takes.
  • I’m a failure.

…it doesn’t help us live our values.

Instead we usually avoid socializing + feel bad about ourselves + plan our next restrictive and cruel diet while binge watching the Netflix show du jour and eating Doritos.

Why do we do this? Our beliefs drive our behavior via the feelings they create. And I’m fat usually creates feelings of shame + insecurity + self loathing.

It doesn’t matter if the thoughts are true or false. The question to ask is,

Does it help me to hang on to this thought?

There’s a simple way to lessen the impact of these thoughts.

When you notice the thought, don’t challenge it or dispute it. Don’t try to push it away or replace it with something positive. Simply replay the words with, “I’m having the thought that,” in front of them.

I’m having the thought that I’m fat.

I’m having the thought that people think I’m lazy.

I’m having the thought that I don’t have what it takes.

See the thought for what it is – a thought. Then ask yourself…

If I let these thoughts guide what I do, does it help me be the person I want to be?

​XO ~Robyn

I’m all booked up for private Weight Loss Coaching through the end of 2015! If you want to work with me in January, don’t wait to reach out. Contact me now to get on the waitlist.

Simply click here to schedule a free Discovery Session or email me directly at robyn@chickadeeweightloss.com. Let’s chat and see if we’re a good fit.

I work with fun + smart + courageous women who want a healthier body and a more delicious life! No calorie counting or elimination of food groups required.

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Transform How You Eat With One Simple Question

Today I want to share a simple tip you can implement right away that will radically change the way you eat.

WHAT we eat isn’t the biggest problem – which is why diets don’t work long term. In order to transform our relationship with food, we need to investigate the WHY behind our overeating and HOW we eat.

A little less nom nom nom and a little more OM.

I’m totally making up this number, but my guess is that 90 something % of Americans are completely checked out when eating. We’re working + driving + surfing the intertubes + reading emails + watching TV.

We start eating and POOF – our oatmeal or sandwich or bowl of popcorn is gone. We didn’t even taste it. We never got a chance to enjoy it.

Today I’m offering a simple strategy. Before you put the next bite in your mouth, ask yourself the following question.

Is there still food in my mouth?

If the answer is NO – eat another bite.

If the answer is YES – finish what you’re eating.

If you’re using a fork or spoon, putting it down between bites helps.

That’s it.

The next time you eat something, give it a go. You’ll probably screw it up. So what. Keep trying.

I promise you – this simple practice will radically transform how you eat. ​

XO ~Robyn

Robyn Spurr is a Once Obese Chick, Eating Disorder Survivor, Certified Weight Loss Coach, Personal Trainer and founder of Chickadee Weight Loss. 

She helps women learn to manage their emotions without food and reach their healthy, natural weight without all the diet craziness.

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5 Simple Non-Food Soul Soothers

The sunrises here in Colorado have been spectacular lately…

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Spending time admiring the natural beauty around me is my favorite way to soothe my soul. Much more effective than say – 27 Oreo’s and half a pint of ice cream.

Non-Food Nurturers provide a dose of pleasure and contentment. They create good feelings + soothe the soul without all the extra calories.

Here are 5 simple ways to soothe your soul (without food)…

1. Read Fiction.

I joined a book club in January of this year because I knew I was reading too much serious stuff (self-help, psychology, business books, oh my). Now I still love me some Brene Brown, but instead of curling up with latest and greatest edition of…

  • improve yourself
  • uplevel your life
  • become your best self

…consider adding something more lighthearted or whimsical to the mix. I’m currently devouring The Book of Speculation by Erika Swyler. It’s filled with tarot cards and traveling carnivals – hauntingly fun and perfect for fall.

2. Unplug!

For an hour, an evening, a day. No email. No Facebook. Read a book. Take a bath. Have a conversation with your spouse minus the iPhones. Stare at the sky. You can do it.

3. Keep a Savor Life Journal

Write down one thing every day that was lovely or made you smile or filled your heart with joy. Read more about keeping a Savor Life Journal here.

4. Spend Time Appreciating Nature

Even if you live in Manhattan, you can visit Central Park or look for the moon in the sky or admire the sunset.

5. Say No

You don’t have to do ALL THE THINGS. If it excites you, say yes. If it doesn’t, say no.  How do you know if you’re saying yes when you should be saying no? One word – resentment. Saying no = less resentment = more time to nurture your soul.

XO ~Robyn

Interested in Private Weight Loss Coaching? Click here to schedule a Discovery Session or email me directly at robyn@chickadeeweightloss.com. I’d love to work with you. Let’s make it happen.

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Robyn Spurr is a Once Obese Chick, Eating Disorder Survivor, Certified Weight Loss Coach, Personal Trainer and founder of Chickadee Weight Loss. 

She helps women learn to manage their emotions without food and reach their healthy, natural weight without all the diet craziness.

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Top Non-Diet Weight Loss Strategies – Learning to Feel

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From childhood until just a few years ago, I used food to check out of myself. Overeating, binge eating, and purging helped me escape the emptiness, self-doubt, anger and gazillion other craptastic emotions I thought I couldn’t handle.

Looking back, I can see that my so-called coping mechanism only perpetuated my state of pain. Bulimia in particular is a brutal and lonely addiction. At the time, the shame and emptiness I felt after binging + purging seemed more tolerable than letting my feelings rise to surface.

I was wrong. So very wrong.

The reason we eat when we’re not hungry is to escape a feeling we don’t want to feel. We use food to numb, to distract, and to cover up our scary + uncomfortable + painful emotions.

For many of us, food is the go-to distraction of choice. It’s cheap, accessible and tasty. For others – it’s alcohol or drugs or sex or shopping.

This is the final post of my non-diet weight loss strategy series – and quite possibly the most important. If you simply make the decision to feel your emotions instead of eating to avoid them, you will lose weight.

Once I made the decision to start feeling instead of overeating or binging and puking, I was terrified. There was nothing to help me dull the pain.

I had to learn to let my feelings be. But I also learned that they would pass. All things pass eventually. It’s like watching a raft float down a river from the riverbank. We see the raft in the distance, it floats by – and then it vanishes from sight.

When we allow our feelings to be, without trying to distract ourselves – they eventually float away.

If you choose to feel, there are rewards – like wisdom. Our feelings have so much to teach us – if we’d only allow them in.

But when we push back + bury + hide from our feelings, they often send a messenger designed to remind us to feel. That messenger is anxiety. Anxiety can persist – unlike fear or anger or sadness.

Anxiety isn’t a raft in a river. It’s a boat in a still lake. ​

The next time you notice yourself wanting to push back the fear or overwhelm or self-doubt, try this instead…

Step 1. Identify the feeling. Be as specific as you can. Is it humiliation or inadequacy or shame? Ask – what am I feeling right now? Get clear. Thesaurus.com can come in handy during this step of the process.

Step 2. Grab your ugly purse!

I can’t remember exactly where I heard this, but a brilliant coach or colleague once said…

Sometimes you have to carry your emotions around with you like an ugly purse.

After you identify your feeling, choose a purse to carry with you. I promise, you won’t have to carry it for long. The feeling will pass. You’ll survive. You can handle ANY emotion. Choosing your ugly purse might even cause you to laugh a little. And laughing is ALWAYS a good thing.

I use this strategy often – like several times a week. In fact, I’ve even created an ugly purse Pinterest board. The avocado backpack cracks me up. I “carry” it when I’m taking life a bit too seriously.

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Step 3. Write down the thoughts you’re thinking that are creating the feeling. For example…

I’m not good enough.
I’m going to screw this up.
Everyone is going to make fun of me.
I can’t handle this.
Get the thoughts out of your head and on to paper (I call this doing a thought download). Observe your thoughts from an objective point of view (impossible to do if they’re in your head).
Seriously guys – just writing down the stuff flying around in your brain creating havoc is like a feel better magic jedi mind trick.

Now you’ll be tempted, but please don’t try to ignore or distract or stuff the feeling down. Stuffing it down is like trying to hold a raft underwater. Capisce?

Grab a pen and a piece of paper – and writewritewritewrite.

The fear of feeling our emotion is a much bigger problem than the emotion itself.

Read that again.

If you’re anything like me (a master of trying to NOT feel), this will be hard – at first. You’ll resist feeling. Your inner 4 year old will kick and scream and want to eat a pint of Ben & Jerry’s instead.

But you can do hard things.

And it’s so very worth it. The only way around is through.

Feel more, eat less.

XO ~Robyn

Robyn Spurr is a Once Obese Chick, Certified Weight Loss Coach, Personal Trainer and founder of Chickadee Weight Loss. 

She helps women learn to manage their emotions without food and reach their healthy, natural weight without all the diet craziness.