Robyn Spurr

Personal Health and Weight Loss Coaching For Women

Self Care

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Giving Ourselves Grace

Hard times can break us – or they can help us grow into deeper + more compassionate human beings. And (I think) the difference between the two has to do with giving ourselves grace.

It’s been a difficult winter.

My husband lost his father suddenly a few months ago and my own Dad (who was very ill) passed three weeks later.

Navigating two terribly sad events in a row reaffirmed that I am a strong woman. Stronger and more resilient than I gave myself credit for.

But I am no superwoman.

About a week after losing my Dad, I sat down on the trail during a hike because I was overcome with emotion.

Some people might consider that a moment of weakness, but I considered it a victory.

A few years ago, I would have pushed through. Told myself to suck it up. To stop crying. To keep walking. I would have been embarrassed if anyone saw me there in the dirt.

But I let myself be messy. I let myself fully feel my truth without judgement. I gave myself grace in that moment.

Judging our emotions as wrong or bad or inappropriate or too much adds a tremendous amount of unnecessary suffering.

Looking back, there were many instances of giving myself grace this winter. Lowering expectations. Focusing on essential habits only (drink water, eat plenty of fruit + veggies, get enough sleep). Skipping the gym and walking outside instead. Hosting book club later in the year. Selling the hockey tickets.

Grace creates space to recover and heal. Grace is like a loving (and effective) parent. Grace is not the same as permissiveness.

No cake for dinner or woe is me or all day Netflix binges. Which would have been quite easy to justify.

The difference? Permissiveness feels good in the moment (like that pint of ice cream), but terrible long-term. Giving ourselves grace feels good both now and later.

I’m still figuring out this thing called life. I don’t have all the answers and never will. But one thing I know for sure is — learning to give myself grace has been a tremendous gift.

“I have met my self and I am going to care for her fiercely.”

― Glennon Doyle, Love Warrior

💙 Robyn

Interested in a one-on-one coaching relationship with me? It would be an honor to work with you if and when the time feels right.

To learn more about Personal Health Coaching click HERE. 

To schedule a Discovery Session click HERE.

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Once I Lose Weight

Most of us think our weight is the main problem that needs to be solved.

I wholeheartedly disagree.

When our obsession with our weight is front and center, we’re unable to focus on any aspect of self-care that doesn’t involve shrinking our bodies.

I’ll be kinder to myself once I lose weight.

I’ll start walking (or go to a yoga class) once I lose weight.

I’ll buy quality clothes that fit well once I lose weight.

I’ll eat what truly feels good in my body once I lose weight.

I’ll book that vacation once I lose weight.

I’ll stop starving myself once I lose weight.

Essentially, we’re neglecting our basic needs and desires until we feel we “deserve” it by losing weight.

This is incredibly unhelpful.

What leads to a healthy body image and long-term healthy behaviors is not a lower weight, but an ability to practice self-care no matter what your weight is.

If you’re wrapped up in hate and shame around your body, you’re not very likely to want to truly take care of it. At least not long-term.

A far more helpful approach is to focus on feeling your best in the body you have now. It’s starting with the end point – practicing daily behaviors that you know make you feel better.

We cannot “control” our weight. But we can shift the focus to practicing healthier habits – a much more attainable goal.

Weight loss is simply a likely side effect of healthy behavior change and consistent self-care.

Starting from a place of kindness and compassion boosts your chances of creating results that stick.

💙 Robyn

Interested in a one-on-one coaching relationship with me? It would be an honor to work with you if and when the time feels right.

To learn more about Personal Health Coaching click HERE. 

To schedule a Discovery Session click HERE.

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Why Nature Makes Us Healthier, Happier and More Creative

I knew that spending time outside was good for me before reading Florence Williams’s, “The Nature Fix.”

To be honest, I wasn’t sure I’d learn anything new from the book.

I was wrong.

Williams decided to write the book after a move from Boulder, Colorado to Washington D.C. left her depressed and wondering if it had to do with the sudden shift to metropolitan living.

Nature, Williams concludes in the book, isn’t just something nice, it is a necessity – and one that is profoundly undervalued.

Researchers have found that time in nature can reduce blood pressure, anxiety, depression, stress, rumination and mental fatigue. It can also improve attention, memory, cognition, sleep, self-esteem and happiness. And the implications may stretch beyond the psychological benefits.

Surprisingly, as powerful as experiences in nature can be, not everyone benefits. Some people (around 15 or 20 percent), just don’t like nature and don’t get much out of it.

My city dwelling + London loving sister comes to mind. I suspect she is a member of this minority.

So how does nature work its wonders for the people who do like it? Williams concludes that “nature appears to act directly upon our autonomic systems, calming us, but it also works indirectly, through facilitating social contact and through encouraging exercise and physical movement.”

Even a small amount of time “can make us less aggressive, more creative, more civic minded and healthier overall.”

As little as 15 minutes in the woods has been shown to reduce test subjects’ levels of cortisol, the stress hormone. Increase nature exposure to 45 minutes, and most individuals experience improvements in cognitive performance.

To stave off depression, Finnish researchers recommend five hours a month in nature, minimum. A doable amount for most of us.

At the start of the year, I introduced a daily walking habit that has proven to be life changing. I’m happier. More energetic. More relaxed. More creative.

I must admit, I’ve been scratching my head about why I didn’t do it sooner.

When working with my clients on introducing new + healthier habits, we always start small.

Given the abundance of research pointing to the benefits of getting outside, consider how you might start small.

Is it possible to carve 15 minutes out of your day to get outside? For me, avoiding social media during the day was essential.

We suffer from an “epidemic dislocation from the outdoors,” Williams writes, and it’s destructive to our mental and physical health. The therapy is straightforward. “The more nature, the better you feel.”

XO ~Robyn

Interested in a one-on-one coaching relationship with me? It would be an honor to work with you if and when the time feels right.

To learn more about Personal Health Coaching click HERE. 

To schedule a Discovery Session click HERE.

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Beauty Sick Book Review

I sometimes struggle with reconciling my advocacy of body acceptance with the fact that I help women lose weight.

Can you respect your body and want to change it?

My answer is a resounding yes. More than ever.

If I didn’t believe this to be true, there is no way I could do this work with integrity.

Unwinding beauty sickness and appreciating what our bodies do FOR us is an essential component of well-being.

In her book, Beauty Sickness, Renee Englen, a professor at Northwestern University and head of the Body and Media Lab, very clearly and in a very compelling manner exposes the cultural epidemic of beauty sickness, the obsession with appearance, and how it affects or has affected most women in America.

Using scientific studies and interviews with women, young and old and from all different walks of life, she shows the disturbing scope of this problem. The stories of these women are heartbreaking and oh-so-familiar and I could see myself (particularly my younger self) in so many of them.

But Renee doesn’t just leave you with the realization of all the damage beauty sickness has wrought, she very gracefully lays out some extremely helpful and practical solutions to the problem.

1. Function over form. When we really stop to analyze how much we focus on appearance, it’s pretty astounding. Instead of focusing on what we (or others) look like, zero in on what our amazing bodies CAN DO (e.g. hug our loved ones, see a beautiful vista, sing a song, hike a trail, smell lilacs).

The way to take better care of your body is not by shaming it, it’s by being kind and practicing gratitude for all the things it does for you.

2. Love not hate. Please don’t listen to those who claim you have to hate how your body looks in order to motivate healthy behaviors. These claims ARE NOT supported by any type of scientific data.

3. Ask different questions. How do you want the world to be different when you leave it? What kind of person do you want to be? What do you want to be remembered for? Probably not great abs. Let the answers to these questions have a greater influence on how you spend your time + money + energy.

4. Media. Don’t consume media messages about the ideal body. Whether its TV shows, your Instagram feed, magazine covers, books – if it pushes the unobtainable, photoshopped ideal, don’t look at it and don’t think about it.

I recently revamped my Instagram feed to include ONLY people + businesses that promote acceptance and inclusivity. Posts that lift me up and inspire. Life changing.

Instead of fighting the poison after it’s already entered your system, change what you’re consuming.

5. Body Talk. Try not to talk negatively about your body, especially in front of children. Whenever we complain about our body we’re encouraging those around us to do the same.

“When we degrade our own bodies, we send the message to others that it’s acceptable for them to do so as well.”

6. Praise Character. When praising others, try not to focus on appearance.

This one is HARD.

We’re conditioned to praise appearance. What’s FASCINATING is the research shows that even a “positive” comment makes the recipient become more body conscious.

“That shirt looks so good on you,” reminds the wearer that her appearance is being critiqued.

Instead of praising appearance, praise character, what they’ve accomplished, who they are at the heart.

“Anything that draws a woman’s attention to the appearance of her own body or makes her feel as though her body is being evaluated can result in body shame.”

I will say, I found this book difficult to read on occasion. It challenges. It triggers. It asks you to reexamine deep-rooted beliefs and behaviors.

But – if you’re ready, it can also be a powerful catalyst for healing.

XO ~Robyn

Interested in a one-on-one coaching relationship with me? It would be an honor to work with you if and when the time feels right.

To learn more about Personal Health Coaching click HERE. 

To schedule a Discovery Session click HERE.