I was on a coaching call with a client this morning and our conversation sparked this post.
It’s easy to get out of control when eating in social situations. Eating at a party, holiday gathering or with family members can trigger strong emotional feelings. Especially when family members are involved.
There’s Aunt Kate showing up 2 hours after dinner begins. Cousin Joe and his 3 rambunctious kids who are on a mission to trash the house. And Grandma Helen criticizing everything from your shoes to the way you’ve raised your children.
Family – God love ’em.
Note: I do not have an Aunt Kate, Cousin Joe or Grandma Helen. But I have family – so I get it.
It’s so easy to justify that third (or fourth) glass of wine or to start stuffing down cookies like no one’s business.
Fortunately, no matter what the circumstance is, you can still have a good time.
It all comes down to our thinking. Consider all the thoughts that tend to bounce around during these types of situations. For example:
- That is SO rude
- I can’t believe he lets his kids behave that way
- Grandma is always criticizing me
This type of thinking often leads to feeling frustrated or sad or angry. The result is often over-indulging and NOT having a good time.
We can allow other people to steal our joy – or not. I’m here to tell you that you DO NOT have to let this happen. I suspect that Aunt Kate, Cousin Joe and Grandma Helen are going to act exactly the same way this year – but YOU can choose to think differently and create a new result. YOU can choose to have fun and enjoy the holiday season.
But Robyn, you don’t understand.
Of course I do.
When you catch yourself thinking all those naughty little joy stealing thoughts, stop, take a breath and simply tell yourself – I’m not going to let you steal my joy.
Imagine a mini Grinch hanging out in your brain. You can feed his grinchiness or feed his heart. It’s that simple.
When Aunt Kate arrives at 8:30 instead of 6:30 – simply think to yourself, I’m not going to let you steal my joy.
When Grandma Helen pulls you aside to mention how unflattering that color is on you – say it again, I’m not going to let you steal my joy.
When Cousin Joe’s 3 year old breaks an ornament – you guessed it, I’m not going to let you steal my joy. Well in this particular case, I might choose the thought – I’m SO glad I only have to see you once a year.
Don’t expect it to be different this year. Because you’ll only be disappointed.
Change your mind instead and create the result you want. A fun and memorable holiday with your family and friends. It’s up to you.
