A few weeks ago, I found myself standing at the baggage carousel at Denver International Airport - overcome with anxiety. It was Monday – and I had just returned home from a funeral in New Jersey - but the anxiety had nothing to do with the funeral. In the past, I likely would have dashed into the nearest convenience store and bought three or four candy bars. Snickers. Three Musketeers. Milky Way. Twix. I would have locked myself inside a bathroom stall and scarfed them all down - one by one. There would have been no savoring – just a frantic attempt to distract myself from the discomfort of the anxiety. That's not what I did. Instead of devouring candy bars, I focused on what I was thinking... "I just want to go home.” "I wish I didn’t … [Read more...] about Airports, Anxiety and Overcoming Emotional Eating
How to Have Fewer Problems
There’s an ugly old beige car parked on the corner of my block. One of the windows is busted out and covered with plastic. It’s been there for weeks or months - I’m not sure. Sometimes it goes away - but it always comes back - to the same spot. And I don’t care. A few years ago, the car would have driven me nuts. I would have carried on about it to my husband. Complained to the neighbors. Gotten pissed off every time I drove by. But I’ve learned so much in the past few years. I’ve learned that trying to control the world and the people around me is a monumental waste of time and energy. All it does is create suffering in the form of anger, resentment, disappointment, and sadness. And the reason so many of my clients overeat is to escape … [Read more...] about How to Have Fewer Problems
How to Stop a Craving
When my clients ask me what to do when they have a craving I always tell them the same thing. Journal. If we eat, we miss out on understanding why we want to distract ourselves with food. That moment of stopping and deciding to write instead of eat requires an override of our deeply rooted patterns of behavior. Given a choice, we will almost always choose our conditioned habits over what we know is best for us. We tell ourselves that a few seconds of ice cream filled deliciousness is better than a delicious life. But I want it I deserve it It's so good I had a bad day It's my favorite flavor My husband is having some Just a scoop I can't resist it I still sit down with a notebook when I experience a craving. Each entry starts … [Read more...] about How to Stop a Craving
How to Feel Beautiful (right now)
How often do you feel beautiful? Do you feel beautiful right now? Did you know that you can feel beautiful every moment of every day if you want to - without losing a pound or tucking a tummy or botoxing a single frown line. No, I haven't lost my mind. Stay with me here. We all have rules that we live by - a set of beliefs unique to each of us. Yet most of us don't even know what our beliefs are. But the rules are there – just below the surface – creating a bunch of unnecessary pain and suffering for many of us. The problem is that most of us have our rules set up in a way that makes it impossible to feel good about ourselves. Let me explain. Here are a few of the beauty rules I “wrote” several years ago - all of the criteria that … [Read more...] about How to Feel Beautiful (right now)